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 Codgering

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Chillout

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Number of posts : 290
Humor : Chilled
Registration date : 2007-12-02

PostSubject: Codgering   Fri Apr 18, 2008 5:04 am

Codgering



I wake up each morning, scratch my ass and head,
Then read the day's obits to see if I'm dead,
And seeing I'm not I get up for a piddle,
Then crawl back in bed where I diddle a little.
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At
six I make coffee and drink it down black,
And eat me some toast, without teeth I just smack.
I turn on the TV, tune in to 'Today'
And watch that cute Katie, she'd make a great lay.

I
watch for a while till I drop off and doze,
Then wake with a start and go put on my clothes.
If it is not raining I go for a walk
And have me a good time just hearing me talk.

But
if it is raining I pick up the phone
And call up my kids who have left me alone.
I find it amusing to make them feel bad
For not ever vis'ting their feeble old dad.

At
lunchtime I slurp on a bowl of beef soup,
Then just before naptime I take a long poop,
But if constipation has clogged up my tract
I drink some fresh prune juice to get it unpacked.

And
daily I tune to the 'Lawrence Welk Show'
To hear the best music, old tunes that I know;
Before I watch Oprah I empty my bladder,
To miss her from pissin' would be even sadder!

I
have early supper then sit in the swing,
While watching the sunset I hear the birds sing;
And when it gets dark I sneak over to watch
Miss Jones through her window while squeezing my crotch.

And
feeling quite happy at how the day ends,
I piss before bedtime and put on 'Depends.'
Then after I put my false teeth in a glass,
I lie on my bed and I scratch my old ass.

[size=9]Within
twenty seconds I fall fast asleep,
For when morning comes -- I've a schedule to keep!
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NICKY
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Number of posts : 3088
Location : Wherever life takes me
Humor : wacky
Registration date : 2007-08-17

PostSubject: Re: Codgering   Sat Apr 19, 2008 2:27 am

lol!
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